Have you ever been in one of those moments where you just make a decision to do something even if you aren’t really sure how it will all work out and then after it’s all said and done you kinda giggle at the past doubtful fearful you? This is EXACTLY what I am feeling right now.
For a long time I have wanted to attend a Tony Robbins event, as I coach I find myself fascinated by his approach. I’ve watched many videos, listened to many podcasts and watched his movie. So when I saw he was coming to Calgary I really wanted to go.
Super excited I clicked the link and the first thing that inevitably happens is I looked at the price. My happiness sunk, my mind begins telling me a story I have heard many times. This money could be better spent. I would need to take the time away from my business. Was I just being silly about wanting to go. Sound familiar?
Have you ever noticed how quickly we can switch that state? I went from this incredible state of excitement ready to do something I have always wanted to do to being down on myself and in a state of judgement. We have so many ways to change our state yet we often have “a favorite flavor of suffering” (as Tony would say) doubt, fear, guilt.
For me I’ve noticed it always comes to my value, my worth. Thinking I’m not worthy of the money being spent, my business would fail because I’d deserve success and on and on my mind goes.
Seeing the pattern
I recognized this behavior and saw my pattern right away. Now that I knew I still had to decide what to do about it. The first thing I did was lean into how I was feeling. What emotion was I feeling and where. I noticed my digestion in knots and I felt stuck. I noticed that I was feeling doubt and fear, so I decided to lean in even more. What was I doubtful of? What was the fear saying?
As I allowed myself to go below the surface I began to noticed I’ve felt this all before. In the same ways. Thinking I was on to something I kept digging. I started using the 5 whys process, and on about the 9th why I heard myself say “because I’m not good enough”.
Ahhh… my limiting belief has come for a visit again. Sound familiar? We all have these limits we’ve put on our self somewhere in our past. In a moment when something happened, someone said something a decision was made to not feel this way again and a belief is born. A belief that was intended to keep us safe in one moment ends up holding us back for all the others.
For me there are many events and moments that contributed to my limiting belief. Each one helped it get stronger and stronger. And if I am watching closely it will creep up on me often. Sliding it’s way into my daily thoughts.
And then what?
I choose to not allow these old beliefs in my head lead me. Feeling I’m not good enough as Tony Robbins would say is not mine to own. This belief has been around for thousands of years and carried by the masses. So if it isn’t mine, I can let it go. I can go back to how I felt just prior to this emotion. Remember that excitement? Having something I have always wanted to do right there at my fingertips? I bought my ticket and didn’t turn back!!!
Learning to remove limiting beliefs
You may be saying to yourself… that seems too simple. Well, believe me it didn’t start out that way. It all started with being coached. One of the things I love about my field is that a large part of our training is not just practicing the skills you are learning. It’s experiencing them, each day we would coach AND be coached. Each time I chose a topic to be coached on, inevitably almost all topics came back to a limiting belief. It is like peeling and onion until I get back to the beginning, that moment where the belief started and having an opportunity to change it.
The rest of this story has changed my life for the better. By taking massive action and buying those tickets it lead me to buying 2 tickets to the 4 day Unleash your Power Within event a dream I have had for 10 years. My husband by my side we travelled to Chicago and after 4 intense days we leaned in, played full on and had a blast. On the first day we walked on fire! The second day we leaned right in to our beliefs and what needs they were feeding. Then on day 3 we transformed those beliefs, kicked them to the curb. We are exactly the same people, just one difference, we have peeled that onion to it’s core and come out the other side with new beliefs. Beliefs that serve us instead of limit us.
If you were to ask me what the most valuable lesson of all my training is? It’s simple! That being a coach isn’t what helps me, we all having knowledge… but it’s when we USE It that magic happens. It is my having coaches and mentors is where I find freedom. Freedom from my patterns, the ability to see them, change them and step forward! I have this group of partners who help me see my patterns, face them head on and choose differently.