Self-Care: How thirty minutes a day is changing my life

Do you self-care?

Last year, I took a class called Caring from the Heart. What I learned is I wasn’t really taking good care of myself. I was reacting to caring for myself versus proactively considering what I needed to thrive. And, I wasn’t alone!

Each week, as we looked at caring for our hearts from a different viewpoint, it didn’t matter who answered the questions or shared their self-care reflections, the experiences were something we could all see ourselves in. Since taking this class, I have dedicated at least thirty minutes daily to caring for myself. The difference is nothing short of LIFE CHANGING.

I am investing time in myself consistently!

Even before the course, I knew self-care was something I put last. Not surprisingly, as a mom, wife, friend, volunteer, and business owner, spending time on myself is not something I would say I do well. I usually tried to squeeze in a short bubble bath here or there. Admittedly, only after everything else I am responsible for was done. By then, I was exhausted and would skip it more often than not.

Not surprisingly, this made everything I did feel more difficult. As a result, I was grumpy more often, I was even missing the parts of life that I normally enjoyed. I was constantly feeling like I was running on empty.

Learning to nourish with self-care

So how do we change the trend? Especially when our monkey mind tells us caring for ourselves is selfish or indulgent. 

When I was little, my Irish Gramma taught me to drink tea. But, first, she would make a pot, then pour a cup. Then, being too hot for me, Gramma would drink the first half of the cup. Then it was my turn; after having a few sips, we would share the last drops with her poodle dog, Sandy. Then back to the kitchen, pour, and repeat.

Tea is a staple in Irish culture; she was adamant that you not mess it up. First, you never wash the pot; it has taken years to get just the right flavor out of it. Keep a cozy over the pot to keep the tea warm. Always use smaller mugs, or it will be cold before you finish. But it would take me almost 40 years to learn the essential part. She never made a cup, always a pot. 

She knew she was going to share it. So, if she made it by the cup, it would take much more effort to nourish herself fully. So, she was teaching me self-care. How often had I made less than I needed, only to be too tired to sustain myself? 

We need to care for our heart

The course, combined with recognizing my Gramma’s lessen, began a trend of thirty minutes to nourish me per day. But, of course, how I use that time varies; sometimes I take a time out, others I call a friend, and often I have that bubble bath.

The difference is highly noticeable; I am changing my value structure by putting myself first. In just 30 days, I went from wanting to find time for myself to making time for myself a priority.

So what’s changed?

My happiness, taking time to fill my cup, gives me energy and inspiration. What happened next is quite profound. There was a significant increase in the quality of my relationships with loved ones and friends. I brought that energy and inspiration to my daily interactions because I positively adjusted how I interacted naturally with others.

I began changing my patterns!

We live in patterns, and these patterns are part of the autopilot of our life. It’s like when you get in your car and drive somewhere; when you arrive, you can’t quite remember how you got there. Or how we all hate Mondays, love Fridays, get a little sad on Sunday nights, and start thinking about work. Then, a couple of times a year, we go on vacation or attend an event that interrupts the pattern. My self-care each day became that interruption. As a result, I became hyper-aware of my patterns, which gave me clear insight.

I also began getting out of my way! I believe that we are our own best cheerleaders and our own worst enemy. Think about it, that thing you want for yourself that on some days is what gets you out of bed. Then the very next day makes you want to stay in bed. The fascinating part is it didn’t matter what I chose to do with my thirty minutes that day; it was always just what I needed. I know that sounds super corny, but it’s just the truth. I don’t believe some cosmic force brought me what I needed. I think I found what I needed in it.

Where to Start?

You may be thinking that all sounds great, but how do I start. Especially when we have so much on the go, all the time, and live in an achievement culture.

The good news, any self-care you do counts. You don’t have to get it right, spend money, or invest hours in your day. Maybe you start with sitting quietly with your first drink of the day, or perhaps you book a massage. 

The hard part is building consistency, especially when your monkey says other things are more important. So, I suggest setting a time each day, having a buddy to share your success and challenges, and being kind to yourself. 


No content on this site, regardless of date, should ever be used as a substitute for direct medical advice from your doctor or other qualified clinicians.


  1. Lindsey says:

    I giggled reading point 4) I was hired out of UofM to work as a provincial employee for driver licensing. I lasted two years, I saw the lack of joy in the eyes of my coworkers, I saw cynical, down trodden souls. I quit and challenged the provincial exams in 3 months and became a licenced financial planner. Best thing any 21year can do, go from government employee to self employed and learn all about finances. To say I almost died of boredom isn’t a stretch, so thankful I took the chance

  2. Violette says:

    Hey there just wanted to give you a quick heads up.
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    • melanie says:

      I apologize that you are having difficulty viewing with IE. I have notified our team and they will look into this. Thank you for taking the time to communicate this issue with us.

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