Recovery from high functioning PTSD and my Eating Disorder: What I didn’t know and how it helped and hindered me

I have spent my life keeping busy. At the height of it I was working 70-80 hours a week, volunteering over 1200 hours a year, over and above being a married mom of two. Five years ago I left this lifestyle, I even thought I had completed this part of my life. And now I can see, I have spent my life keeping busy because then I never had the time to deal with the pain, the thoughts, the emotions, the trauma. I was filling the space up to not feel. Continue Reading

The rest I didn’t know I deeply needed

We live in a society that is focused on productivity, high producing, and achieving behaviors. We say things like “do more with less” and “sleep when I’m dead”. We see people who are busy as productive, stressed as up to big things, and achievement as the only important measure of success. The result is we are experiencing significant increases in chronic fatigue or its more recently introduced name, myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME). A 2017 survey shows some 560,000 Canadians report that they have the disease, a 36.7 percent increase over previous results from 2014. The number also suggests the disease may be more common than breast cancer, Parkinson’s disease, and multiple sclerosis combined. Since March of 2020, we are seeing significant experiences of compassion fatigue, lockdown fatigue, and pandemic fatigue. Continue Reading

I am not resilient: A story of discovery and recovery

How it started I am a human being. And until recently I didn’t really know what that meant. This is my story of discovery and recovery. There is a traumatizing moment in my childhood where the playful curiosity immediately faded and I began carrying the backpack of PTSD. From this day forward I layered on Continue Reading